3rd Season Episode Guide
I don't do reviews for the 1st and 2nd season, cos we've all seen enough of those, I only do brief third season review, usually containing snide remarks :-). ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Rating System:
It sucked
Eh, could've been better
Pretty dang good
Da bomb!
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Anne Dead Man's Party Faith, Hope and Trick All Men Are Beasts Homecoming Band Candy Revalations Lovers Walk The Wish Amends Gingerbread Helpless The Zeppo Bad Girls Consequences Dopplegangland Enemies Earshot Choices The Prom Graduation Part One Graduation Part Two
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Well Buffy's back and ready to kick ass in a whole new season starting out with the fabulous premire of Anne. Buffy has left Sunnydale, as you all know, and has ended up in some ronchy city. She has taken a job working at a diner and runs into a girl, Lily (Lie to Me) who remembers her and follows her for awhile being friendsly. Buffy has shut herself out though, and refuses the friendship. Soon after, Lily's boyfriend goes missing, and while searching for him, Buffy incounters Ken, a man looking for upset teens living in the streets. Buffy soon finds Lily's lover, dead and looking over 80. Lily is so upset she runs away, and upon encountering Ken, goes with him to the "shelter". He tells her to wash herself in this dirty pool, and she is sucked in. Buffy comes in and she and Ken wrestle and fall in. He lands facefirst and his face comes off, revealing ugly little oragey features and yellow teeth. He is gonna use them as slaves, and Buffy and Lily are thrown in a cell to await their fate. Sorry, I won't tell you the ending. You'll have to see for yourself!
With Buffy back, everyone is a little edgy. Especially her friends, distant and a little cold. Her mom is nervous, and seems to almost wish Buffy would leave again. When a dead cat is found in their basement, it just soes not help the situation. That night, the Nigerian mask her mom perchased glows, and the dead kitty claws it way outta the grave. In the morning, Buffy and her mom are arguing, when her mom opens the door and formerly dead kitty pops in. Now that is heart attack material. That night, a party is thrown for Buffy, except most off the people their don't even know her, her friends won't talk to her, and when Buffy tries to escape to the kitchen, she overhears her mom saying it would might have been better if Buffy hadn't come home. Buffy prepares to leave again, and an angry Willow and devistated mother stop her. The party breaks up and they fight, Buffy trying to make them understand her pain, they telling her how selfish she is. Just as Buffy and Xander are about to duke it out, a bunch of zombies leap through the window, breaking necks and trashing the house. I won't expose the crappy ending, you'll have to see it for yourself!
Life is getting back to normal for Buffy. She is with her friends, her mom is getting better, and she is going back to school. Her friends have even tried to set her up with Scott, a boy who likes her and who her friends think would help her forget about Angel. She has even started to slay vampires, and so when a weird looking guy leads a girl out of the Bronze, Buffy follows. She sees the vamp about to bite the girl, when the girl starts kicking his ass, and stops momentarily to say, "You must be Buffy. Hi. I'm Faith. Can I borrow your stake?" and stakes the vamp. Well we all knew it was coming. The spoilers said so, we all saw it coming, and even Joss Whedon metioned it once or twice. Anyways, it turns out that Buffy's friends all love Faith, Giles seems to like her, and even Buffy's mom has taken a shine to her. The only problem is her and Buffy don't get along very well. But as it turns out, Faith's watcher is not in England, she's dead. And it is because of a vampire older then the Master, so old his hands are cloven, and he's come to Sunnydale to kill Faith.
Xander falls asleep on "Oz Watch" and someone is found ripped apart and dead. When they look in Oz's cage they find the window open. So Buffy goes on watch and sees Angel running about! So naturally she chains him up, but he is neither good or bad, more savage, not speaking, acting like an animal, etc. She talks to Giles who says that time is different in hell and Angel has spent over a century there. He may either come back or be totally savage and not repond to human contact....or love. Meanwhile Buffy and Scott have hit it off and she has met his two friends. Although one of them has a weird condition which makes him totally nuts and violent! Can't tell the ending, sorry! :-)
This ep gives you a real look at Cordelia......and for the most part didn't like it!!! Basically, its a scramble for the title of "Homecoming Queen". >:-( Cos Buffy doesn't have a life, and she knows it. Her only high school consolation is that she will be in the Yearbook....which also won't happen because Cordelia was supossed to tell her about it but was to busy campaigning. >:-( And when Buffy consults her about that, Cordelia just insults her too much saying really nasty stuff and not realizing it! and Buffy gets soooooo pissed that she decides to run for Homecoming Queen too. She and Cordelia get angrier, turning it into less of a competition and more of a war!!! And their friends don't like it so they make them sit together in a limo and discuss it (and the limo wasn't cheap so they better work it out :-)). But they are ambushed by Mr. Trick and his gang, who have thought up Slayfest '98 and they think Cordy is Faith. So it is all a big charade and the title of Homecomig Queen goes to....... ;-) I'm not telling!
:-( Whoever thought chocolate wuz so dangerous! Principal Snyder hands out some chocoate to be sold as "Band Candy", to raise money for the band (cos you know, those tall hats are pretty expensive!). But the chocolate makes the adults act weird. Like teenagers, and I must say, Buffy's mom looks like a slut, and Giles has a serious attitude prob! And who is shipping out the chocolate but our good friend Ethan Raine!!! Yeah! He's back!
And I am sorry to disapoint you but I didn't see the end, and if you would like to tell me the ending like the good person you are, e-mail it to me!
Basically, everyone finds out Angel is back. Xander catches Buffy and Angel making out. There is a new Watcher, she is an evil bitch, and this new demon comes to get the hand of someone or another that shoots lightening. The new Watcher gets her arm cut off, the demon gets his head cut off, and Buffy gets her head bit off by angry people who are freaked about Angel, and Xander is back to being a pissy jerk }: ( In the end, Angel saves Willow, Watcher most likely goes to Hell, like everyone else in this town, and people forgive Buffy and Angel cos he saved Willow.
Guess who's back? It's Spike! Yeah!!! He is pissed and drunk cos Dru left him, and mad at Angel, and whining to everyone about her making out with a Chaos Demon (you ever seen one, they're ugly as hell, so I says I ain't gonna take this no more, and you know what she said?.....). And he wants Willow to cast a love spell to make Dru come back to him, so he kidnappes her and Xander. Meanwhile that creepy mayor is sending troops to take care of Spike, and these are bombed with holy water, courtesy of Angel and Buffy. Spike decides to leave, he is just gonna tie up Dru and torture her till she likes him again (now thats love! :-) Oz and Cordy save Willow and Xander in the factory were Spike left them, but they see them making out. Cordelia runs up the stairs in anguish, and the stairs break, and she falls, and lands with a big, four foot long spike through her stomach. She looks like she will die, cos she can't see and is bleeding nastily. She is ok, she just never wants to see Xander again.
I MISSED THE FIRST HALF OF THIS EPISODE!!! But thats OK, I know what happened. Cordelia's gang humilates her, but first introduces her to the new girl. Cordelia is so angry about her friends dumping her that she blames it all on Buffy. She tells this to the new girl who says she can have any wish. She wishes Buffy had never come to Sunnydale, and the girl turns around with a moster face on. She is really the demon who grants the wishes of scorned women. Anyway, in the new Sunnydale, Willow and Xander are vamps, Angel is their toy which they burn with matches, the Master is back , and the Scooby Gang is Oz, Giles, Owen and someone else. They listen to Cordelia talking about Buffy, and when the vamps find out they run and Xander and Willow kill Cordelia. Later there is a fight with Giles and some vamps when the new Buffy comes with long hair, carpenter pants and scars on her face. She and the Scooby Gang minus Giles fight the vamps who have developed mass production of sucking blood through tubes into wine glasses, and Xander and Willow and Angel are staked, Willow by Oz, and Buffy is killed by the Master. Giles calls up the demon and steals her necklace, smashes it, and everything is back to normal.
Angel is haunted by visions of his past, including our favorite Jenny. They tell him they only brought him back to kill Buffy, and that is his destiny. He has dreams about killing people on Christmas, all of those people haunting him, telling him hateful things and all. Buffy is in his dreams, she has them too, and she consults Giles who says they have to research. Her, Giles, Willow and an apologetic Xander can't find anything. They meanwhile Buffy falls asleep and dreams about *ahem* her and Angel (you know what I mean). A man without eyes appears in the corner, and Angel bites Buffy, then they wake up. Giles finds out he is haunted by priests, who are servents of the First Evil. He reads a sentence, "Nothing shall grow, above or below", and Buffy remembers a patch of dead Christmas trees. She chops open the ground, and talks to Evil who is in the form of Jenny. She goes into a long speech about how evil she is, and Buffy interrups, "OK, I get it, you're evil. Do we have to chat about it all day?" and Evil tells her Angel will be dead by dawn. Angel is waiting for sunrise a top a hill, and Buffy begs him not to kill himself, that he can make amends for his wrongs. He tells her to go away, and she starts crying and telling him he can't leave her, and she gets angry and starts calling him a coward and begging. During her pleading, ir starts to snow. In Sunnydale, California. Angel and Buffy go for a walk in the snow.
Buffy's mom is being weird and choosing Buffy's slaying to bond.... while Buffy's killing a vamp, her mom comes across the bodies of two cute children lying dead in the playground. When she and Buffy find out the mark on the dead kids' hands is a witch sign, Joyce goes nuts and froms MOO (Mothers Opposed to the Occult), has a locker search at Sunnydale High, confinscates all Giles' important evil books, and finally drives the adults, who are being controlled by the ghosts of the dead kids, to try to burn Willow, Buffy, and my favorite Amy at the stake. Then Giles and Oz find on the net that the same kids have died every year from 1649, and they prey on small towns to make them turn against eachother. The children are named Hansel and Gretel, and they hate witches. Well, then Giles and Cordy rescue them, turn the kids into an guly monster, and Buffy runs it through with the stake she is tied on. The coolest thing about this ep was we finally met Willow's mom, who is a self absorbed weirdo who knows nothing about her daughter.
This ep really made me mad cos Giles was a shallow loser. Its Buffy's eighteenth birthday and once again it sucks for her. All the Slayers, if they live to be eighteen, have to be "tested". They lose their superpowers and have to fight a crazy vampire on vampire style steriods. Giles has to stick her with a needle and drug her to take away her powers. When the evil vamp breaks loose, her mom is kidnapped and Giles is forced to tell her the truth. She gets really mad and upset, because her Giles has betrayed her for a bunch of stinky old white guys who seem really grumpy. She goes to the house where her mother is kidnapped and kills the vampire with putting holy water in his galss of water which he needs to swallow his vampire steriod pill things. She and her mom survive, and so does Giles, who arrives at the last moment after Buffy has killed evil dude. The white stinky Council people congradulate her, but to Giles they say he's failed the test, and is relieved of his Watcher duties. Once again they congradulate Buffy, to which she says, "Bite me."
The Zeppo THIS EPISODE GOT A BIG FAT 0 STARS COS IT SUCKED!
This was the worst episode I have ever seen. Go somewhere else for the review.
This episode shows ya how bad Faith really is. She and Buffy develope a nice bond and disaster strikes. But the beginning... Giles is still "Watching" Buffy, but there is a new guy. He is not evil (we can always hope) and annoyingly vain, plus he thinks he's so tough and....arg! He won't be around long, LOL. You never can appriciate how cool Giles is after you see this guy flip out... Buffy and Faith go out, Buffy skipping her chem test to go dancing and whatnot. While they are slaying, Faith accedently stakes the mayor's secratary guy or something, Alan. He dies and it makes you wanna cry but then Faith runs away and Buffy does to but she does know what to do. He was so nice. Well, the new demon in town, Blapzar or somethin', is so fat!!!!!! Not like people, he has no visible legs and has to be kept wet. He can levitate ppl and crush their heads. When the new Watcher is whining that the demons precious amulet was given to Buffy's boyfriend, but he can't place the name, Buffy and Angel storm in, kill the demon, and all is good. But when Buffy goes to see Faith to talk about what they did, Faith closes it by saying, "You don't get it, B. I don't care."
Faith is a real bitch, as this episode reveals! Even after killing someone, Faith tells Buffy that they are above other people- they've saved the entire world, but Buffy still disagrees. She wants to tell someone, hiding it is still wrong. Faith says no, but Buffy tells Willow anyhow. Willow suggests telling Giles; he always knows what to do. When Buffy goes in, Giles steps out of the way to show Buffy Faith is there. Faith says that "he had to know what you did" and Buffy realizes that Faith told Giles that Buffy killed him. Giles tells Buffy to get in his office, like he believes Faith. Giles then tells her, yeah, he knows Faith is a liar, but she is in denial, and needs help. He says that usually a Slayer will go to England to face trial, but for now, no one else must no. Weeeell, Mr. My-Mummy-Sez-I'm-Cool Watcher overhears. Meanwhile, Giles, Buffy and the gang call a meeting, and decide Faith would be better just talking to one person. Xander makes that one person him, and goes over to talk to Faith. She goes at him again *shudder* and then tries to kill him. Angel hits her with a bat and puts chains on her (they're still on his wall) and then Wesley comes in and frees Faith from big chains only to put on lil' chains hee hee hee.... anyhow, cos I'm bored of writing this, she escapes, then she and B are arguing and Faith steps under a heavy crate. Buffy pushes her and gets hit. Then Mr. Trick steps in and has his tie around Buffy's neck to choke her. Just when he is about to bite her, Faith stakes him. He says, "Oh no. This is not good at all." and explodes :-) Faith goes in and talks to the mayor ta get a job.
Anya comes back cos she wants to be an eternal, evil, bitch thingy, but "they" won't let her so she's gonna do it herself. She convinces Willow that she wants to get her necklace back cos it was "stolen from her mom's apartment". Willow and her do the spell, but during it, Willow gets a flash of the world without Buffy, the one during "the Wish". She freaks and tells Anya to do the spell without her. Anya gets pissy and Willow just leaves. What she doesn't realize it that the spell brought the vamp Willow out of the other world and into the normal one. Everyone sees bad Willow and at the Bronze, this jerk-off who Snyder told Willow to tutor comes up and demands that Willow get cracking on a report of his. Bad Willow is bored and throws him twenty feet. Everyone gets scared and Willow leaves. Buffy and Xander think it's their fault for treating Willow like the "reliable-dog-geyser" person. Meanwhile bad Willow recrutes some vamps cos she wants to make Sunnydale like it was in her own world. They take over the Bronze and feed on a girl to demonstrate. Bad Willow leaves and finds good Willow. They get in a fight and Willow shoots bad Willow with a tranquilizer dart. They switch clothes and good Willow goes to the Bronze pretending to be bad. Anya, whose there at the club, realizes the difference and Buffy and Angel rush in, whoop ass, and the vamp recruties get dusted. They send bad Willow back to her own universe just in time to get staked.
I really liked this episode. It was kind of interesting... This demon comes to town offering to sell Buffy and Faith "books of assention". He sez they'd be really useful to the mayor, so Faith tells him and he tells her to kill the demon and get the books, which she does. After she's killed him, she looks at the blood and her hands all scared looking. She runs to Angel, telling him she's scared of what she is turning into. She hugs him and then tries to push things a bit, and he tells her that he's with Buffy. She apologizes and leaves, but gets in a kiss on the cheek. Buffy, who was going to see Angel, sees this and leaves. Meanwhile, Faith tells the mayor how she tried, but couldn't get Angel that one moment of true happiness, so the Mayor sez they'll do it another way. Later, Buffy tells Willow about Faith and Angel, and Willow tells Buffy that Angel wouldn't do that to her, and to go talk to him.
The mayor calls up a demon who sez he'll take away Angels soul. The demon and Faith go to Angels. Faith splashes Angel with blood and the demon does a little whirly thing and poof, Angel's soul is kapoot. He and Faith fight and end up making out, then go to see the mayor. He tells them to kill Buffy, and so they go tie her up and Faith rants awhile about her depressive childhood, and how she's sick of hearing nothing about Buffy, when really she's the best Slayer. Buffy sez "I never knew you had so much rage in you." and Faith sez "What can I say? I'm the world's best actor." Angel suddenly sez "Second best". Faith looks at him as Buffy pulls off the fake chains. Faith screams and runs away. Cos you see, really, the demon was working for Giles, and so he didn't really take Angel's soul, and it was all a plot to trick Faith.... Oook..... but it was a good ep though! Now I'm gonna go eat cookies.
This episode was kooky. It starts out with Buffy and Angel killing vamps. Whatever. The point is, Buffy wants to go away to college but her duties are holding her back. She compromises, saying if she stops the mayor's assention then they can let her go away. Meanwhile the mayor has a box pull of evil spider thingies. So they break in and steal the box, but Faith captures Willow. They trade back, after Willow has stolen some pages of the Books of Assention and told Faith she's a whiny bitch. Willow gives Giles the pages, and anyhoo, Willow tells Buffy she's decided to stay in Sunnyhell and go to their colleges cos she wants to fight evil and be a baddass witca. So they end up deciding to go to Sunnyhell college together. THE END :-)
The Prom
Sorry but I didn't like eppie. I mean, sure it was sad the Angel is going away and leaving Buffy blah blah blah, but that dress!!! Buffy's dress looked like she took a tube top and wrapped it in tissue paper. Bleh. At least she got her cutie lil' umbrella thing.
Second, I thought that guy who sent all hellhounds had a crappy motive. I mean, just cos some girl said no to him, he gets all pissed and has to kill everyone? Yeah, OK.
Graduation Part I
Saw these 2 but am 2 lazy 2 write em up 2night.
Graduation Part II